Twisted Church Hymns ;)


So…..its Sunday and most folks are busy getting ready for Church. Ive got some time yet before I would need to go so Im sitting here having a one way convo with my significant other (he’s in a different time zone and prob already in church LOL!) and I get to thinking about our chat last night and how it usually always turns X-rated….and wondering what the heck he’ll be thinking about in Church today….because I know what I’m thinking about (!) when it occurred to me that those old standby Church hymns could sure take on a new meaning if you didnt have your mind properly on God:

Rock of Ages (cleft for me)….let me hide myself in Thee (hooboy, that one is too easy!)

I need Thee every hour (hear that babe?)

Awake and Arise (Yeah!)

In the Garden (for variety!) Just be sure your effing neighbors O_o arent watching!!

New Every Morning is the Love (thank Goodness!)

Majestic Sweetness Sits

Go Labor on, Spend and be Spent

Oh Master, when thou callest (Submissives like this one!)

Open now thy Gates of Beauty (how to sweet talk yer girl!)

Everlasting arms of Love

……as you can see, the Hymnal is full of reminders that one of the first things God said to Adam and Eve:

Go forth, be FRUITFUL and MULTIPLY!

I guess its ok if the Saints sin just a little eh?

note: many of the titles came from this site

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~ by irishgrl on August 10, 2008.

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